Getting a divorce means your marriage is legally over, and you are once again a single person. You are free to remarry and you are in charge of your own finances, plans, and future.
If you’re not ready for such a permanent break from your spouse, you can choose separation instead. Separation means you are living apart from your spouse—it’s not a divorce, and you’re still legally married. However, getting separated does, in most cases, affect the financial relationship between you and your spouse. There are three different types of separation, explained below.
1. Legal Separation - A formal, court-ordered arrangement where spouses live apart but remain legally married.
- Key Features:
- Involves filing a petition with the court.
- The court can issue orders regarding property division, child custody, child support, and spousal support.
- Allows couples to retain benefits like health insurance or meet religious requirements that prohibit divorce.
- Can be reversed or converted into a divorce later.
- Purpose: Often chosen for financial, religious, or personal reasons when divorce isn’t immediately desired.
2. Trial Separation - An informal arrangement where spouses live apart temporarily to evaluate their relationship.
- Key Features:
- No court involvement or legal documentation.
- Marital rights and responsibilities remain intact.
- Any property or income acquired may still be considered marital.
- Purpose: Used as a cooling-off period or a test to decide whether to reconcile or proceed toward divorce.
3. Permanent Separation - A long-term separation where spouses live apart with no intention of reconciling, but without a formal legal process.
- Key Features:
- May eventually lead to divorce.
- Depending on the state, property and income acquired after separation may no longer be considered marital.
- Can be formalized through a separation agreement.
- Purpose: Offers clarity and structure for couples who want to remain married but live independently.
In certain circumstances, you also have the option of having your marriage annulled. An annulment is very different from a divorce, because once a marriage is annulled, it’s as though the marriage never happened.
There are several factors that will determine the cost of the divorce. These include minor-age children, the amount of assets, and most importantly, the cooperation and flexibility of the two spouses. The national average for using mediation in divorce is between 10-20% of what it costs to hire a divorce lawyer for each spouse. I am happy to discuss your specific costs during the free hour-long information session. Unlike with a litigated divorce, mediation allows you to know the cost before you even start.
You begin by filing a petition within the county where you reside. I utilize a legal paper processor to make the process as easy as possible for my clients.
Absolutely. When a divorce is completed through mediation, court can be entirely avoided.
Yes. Full financial disclosure is typically required. Hiding assets can lead to significant legal penalties.
Each session usually lasts 1-2 hours.
There are several factors that determine how many sessions. These factors include length of sessions, the level of cooperation and flexibility of those involved, and the complexity of the disagreements (for example, minor-age children and assets). The average amount of time is approximately 4-6 hours.
Absolutely! Confidentiality is a primary characteristic of mediation. With the exception of the final agreement, anything discussed in mediation stays in mediation. (The mediator is obligated to report any child or elder abuse/neglect to the authorities.) In a litigated trial, whoever is present in the courtroom hears all the details of your divorce. Courtrooms are usually open to the public.
This is a great question! In mediation, you and your spouse have 100% of the decision-making ability. In court, you give that control to the judge. Your most important life decisions will be made by a complete stranger. Mediation allows you to make the decision on every important part of your divorce.
Yes. After all the agreements have been made, both parties have signed the final document, and after it has been sent to and approved by the judge, it becomes a court order, which is enforceable by law.
- Alternating Weeks — Child spends one week with each parent.
- 2-2-3 Rotation — Two days with Parent A, two with Parent B, then three with Parent A; the next week flips.
- 3-4-4-3 Rotation — Three days with one parent, four with the other, then swap the next week.
- Every Other Weekend + Weekdays — One parent has weekends, the other has most weekdays.
- Split Weeks — Half the week with each parent (e.g., Mon–Wed / Thu–Sun).
- Bird’s Nest Custody — The child stays in one home, and parents rotate in and out.
- Custom Plans — Tailored to work schedules, school calendars, and the child’s needs.
- Joint Legal Custody — Both parents share decision-making on major issues like education, healthcare, religion, and extracurricular activities. The child may live primarily with one parent or split time between both.
- Joint Physical Custody — The child spends substantial, scheduled time living with each parent. This can be equal or close to equal, depending on what’s practical and in the child’s best interest.
- Combination Custody — Parents share both legal and physical custody, balancing decision-making and living arrangements.